I was naive. I thought it exist but the foolish me realized that it only exist in my own world. I thought I could wait. It is so hard to let go. I knew it very well that fairy tales do not exist. But can I wait a little longer? I can't help myself for looking for you.

You have been on my mind every moment, I grow fonder everyday. Every feeling, every word and every actions, I have imagined it all. I don't know what has taken me so long and so far to let go all of my doubts. I'm scared to let go of you, I'm afraid to lose you. Give me a chance. I just want to walk with you. 

You promised you would never leave. But where are you?

But I miss you so much. I miss you so bad. 

Nobody wants to wait forever and nobody will be with you forever. You don't know how you are making me feel.

What does forever means to you?

I will blow my brain, I will blow my heart. I will blow every part of me that has you. 

So after 2 years and 4 months, it's no longer me that you want
But I love you so much that it hurts
Never mistreated you once
I poured my heart out to you
Let down my guard swear to God
I'll blow my brains in your lap
Lay here and die in your arms
Drop to my knees and I'm pleading
I'm trying to stop you from leaving
You won't even listen
Tears stream down both of my cheeks
Then I let you just go and just give
And before I put that gun to my temple
I am telling that
I would have done anything for you
To show you how much I adored you
But it's over now
It's too late to save our love
Just promise me you'll think of me every time you look up in the sky and see a star


And I am so lost without you. 


I promise you that I won't be making a mistake anymore. It is torturous to feel you toying with my emotions. I have got a hole in my heart and you punctured my lungs, taking my breath away. My body aches when I ain't with you; 

I have zero strength

Papa, I very long didn't see you already. Do you miss me like how I miss you? Papa, I envy my friend, she said she was nervous to see her parents tomorrow. I wonder when I would have that feeling. If I am given a chance to see you again, I would hug you very tightly and say, "I'll be alright". I know you're somewhere far away so I would talk to the moon every night to let you know how I get through each day. I know you miss me too, papa.  

 "No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life's change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away." - Steve Jobs